Obviously, becoming a step-parent can be one difficult situation any adult can find himself in. For that matter, most step-parents are always looking around to find answers on the kind of role they are supposed to play in the lives of their new step kids.
It is also
common to see stepkids proving very difficult for their stepparents for
various reasons.
This usually
happens because stepkids disregard their stepparent as their guardian and
thus constantly disrespect their orders. Most of the kids go by,‘’ you are not my
parent to tell me what to do.’’
That is why
it is vital for the stepparent to first establish a good relationship
with the ex. Creating that relationship can help you gain the parent's trust, whereby he will give you full permission to play his role for him as a
parent.
Today’s
article is to help step-parents identify the roles a step has to play in the
life of their new ward.
Without going on further, let’s quickly
look at these roles.
1. Discipline;
Many step-parents don’t like to involve themselves when disciplining
their step kids, but it is a crucial job parents taking care of kids must
not shy away from.
This is very
important because, without discipline, children might become wayward
and a nuisance to society at large, and I don’t think you would want this for
your ward.
Some step-parents take the role of being deputies when it comes to disciplining their
wards. This means that they give support to the child's parent in
any reasonable discipline being meted out to their child.
This can be
a start for you if you are a step-parent who doesn’t want to be the disciplinarian.
2. Encourage them to be in touch with their other parent;
It is no doubt that most kids who have their parents separated stop talking to their parent who leaves if that parent is alive. The reason is that they put the blame on that parent for being the cause of the separation and stopped talking to them.
Here is
where you come in as the step-parent.
It is your
role to help the child reconnect with the father if that is the case. Be sure
to always ask your child to give him a call or text to know how he is doing.
Be the
bridge in reconnecting them.
3. Encourage them;
Growing up, children will face a lot of difficulties at school and in society as well, and that can have a drastic impact on their lives if they don’t have someone to
guide and encourage them that things will be fine.
You can step
in this one by encouraging them that though things seem to be tough, they will
get better.
Sometimes
encouragement is just what kids need to help them rebuild their confidence.
4. Be a friend;
This is the
most critical time your step teenager needs a friend to help him
process the new changes. Though there is no way you can replace his biological
parent, being a friend can help a lot.
5. Show up;
When there
is an important event that your stepchild has to show the world what he loves
to do, you must be present to show your support for that child. This cannot
be understated because it indicates to the child that you admire and support
them in what they love doing.
If there is a sports event, recitals, or any other event apart from those held
by schools featuring your ward, be willing to commit a hundred percent of your
time.
Conclusion
I forgot to stress that you must remember that you aren’t the child's natural parent and whether the real parent is alive or dead, you
cannot fill that position as a stepparent.
And also, don’t
expect appreciation when you do something for your stepchild or from the natural
parent, though that will be nice but don’t push it. You were aware of the stepchild situation before accepting to take on that responsibility, so expecting
appreciation from doing what is required of you is a No for me.
I hope this
article has helped answer your question.
If you know
of other step-parent responsibilities that have not been listed, please
share with us in the comment section so we can learn from you.
Thanks for
reading.
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